With Soul
A week ago, I photographed a wedding at the Allegria in Long Beach. I grew up on the Long Beach boardwalk. My family would go together, and I would race my brother on our bikes to the end; the 3 mile boardwalk seemingly infinite under the hot sun and the hotter competition.
When I moved back home at 24, I spent my mornings at Long Beach before my night shift as a waitress. I would ride by bike 10 miles, and then park on the sand, lay out and read a book or write. It was so simple, and yet such a consistent part of my day.
As I stood on the rooftop of the Allegria, listening to the distant waves crash against the jetties, I took in the moment. To the left, a little kid was flying a kite with his dad, to my right, a family was riding their bikes on the boardwalk. Directly in front of me, a nervous man was putting the finishing touches on the heart he made of roses as the words “Will you Marry Me?” illuminated behind him. It was the first time in the month of June where I felt fully present and it made me yearn for the days I spent on this beach in the morning seven years earlier.
I have been struggling with the idea that my time is not my own right now. Other people are scheduling me to be at things, taking away the time I allocate to myself to do things that enrich my soul, like this little page of mine.
I thought about this idea that I am struggling because I am over scheduled. I thought I was yearning for the simpler days in my life; the lackadaisical days I spent reading on the beach, working on my olive skin tone before only working 5 hours and making more per hour than I would at any 9-5. But, as I watched the woman say yes to the proposal right in front of me, I realized I am not craving the freedom of those simpler days. No, I’m craving the simplicity of consistency. I have always been so hard on myself; comparing myself to others, beating myself up for not achieving more, and for a while, I thought this craving for the earlier days was a flaw in my work ethic. But, with my camera in my hand, 8 hours into a double header- I realized I am not lazy or unwilling to work; I just want to control my own time to be more creative.
Having a routine allows for creativity to fly. Think about it; Steve Jobs wore the same outfit everyday because he didn’t want to use his energy to think about clothes. J.D Salinger spent 8 hours a day writing in a converted shed in his house for the rest of his life, earmarking them for post-humous publishing. The most brilliant minds achieve what they say they will because they are selfish with their time. They protect their consistent routine at any means, and it’s that boundary that I am most craving.
The end of June brings an opportunity to set intentions for July- my goal is to learn to say no, and not to be so hard on myself when I have to be consistently inconsistent to survive.
In honor of consistency, today, I’m sharing my favorite Weight Watchers friendly nightly dinner for when I’m by myself.
With Salt
My Taco Soul-ad… okay, I know.. I pushed the boundary there, haha. Seriously though, here is the recipe to my absolute favorite meal. I eat this pretty much every night when I eat alone.
INGRIEDIENTS
Shredded iceburg lettuce
Beans (I use garbanzo beans, but I’ve also used pinto or black beans)
Tomatoes
Onions
Avocado
Peppers
Sour Cream or Greek Yogurt
Hot sauce
Tortilla Chips (preferably hint of lime tortillas for extra flavor)
Lime
Cheese of your choice: I flip flop between the taco seasoned cheese you can find at any grocery store and cheddar cheese
Taco Meat: I use lean turkey or ground beef, but have made this with shredded chicken or pork.
PREPARE TACO MEAT
In a large skillet, over medium heat, brown your ground meat and break it up into chunks as you cook it. While it’s cooking, I season it with salt, pepper, and trader joes lime seasons. (You can use a taco seasoning packet, but, I find those to be high in sodium so I make my own)
Simmer on low while you prep the rest.
PREPARE THE SALAD
Chop up lettuce, tomatoes, onions, peppers and avocados
Drain your beans of choice
Grab a large bowl, and throw everything into the bowl while you wait for the taco meat to finish
PREPARE YOUR DRESSING:
3 tablespoons of low fat sour cream or Greek yogurt and place it in a mixing bowl
2 tablespoons of hot sauce
A dash of salt and pepper
2 tablespoons of lime juice
Mix it all together and, voila, your dressing is ready
FINAL STEPS:
Take the meat and place it on top of your salad and finish it with your dressing. Mix it all together and enjoy! The whole meal takes about 20 minutes all together and will leave you full and happy for hours.